Relationships 101: Twlight shows us what not to do

Stalker. Co-dependency. Depression. Obsession. Addiction. Sound romantic? Apparently so. According to the Twilight phenomena, these topics are the key to a successful love story.

So the third installment of the Twilight series, Eclipse, is coming out next week. Apparently people have already been camping out for the premier for a couple of days.

I’ll admit that I’ve read all four books, and I was totally hooked. For some strange reason, I found the love story completely addictive. I guess it’s because everyone wants to be desired, right? Stephanie Myers manages to create the ultimate romantic pursuit while communicating human desire at a whole new level.

However, when I took a step back and actually considered the implications developed in the book, I was left feeling frustrated and disgusted.

My biggest concern about Stephanie Myers’ saga is the fact that her target audience is young, impressionable girls. Sure, adults may be able to enjoy reading the book while still realizing that Bella and Edward’s relationship is incredibly unhealthy (we hope), but what about young girls who are developing what they want in a relationship?

As far as I’m considered, when you’re younger and read a book it can easily become a part of your identity. Maybe it depends on the type of person that you are, but I know different book series that I read when I was in my early teens definitely helped shape the person that I’ve become.

Even if there were no vampires involved, Twilight develops a very dangerous relationship and romanticizes obsession at a whole new level.

In case you’re unfamiliar with the series, I’ll bring you up to date with just a handful of the negative aspects of Bella and Edward’s relationship.

First of all, Edward sneaks into Bella’s room at night to watch her sleep, and when she finds out that he does this, she is flattered rather than being creeped out. Meanwhile, girls all over the globe are thinking “aw, he likes watching her sleep,” while forgetting to think about the fact that he broke into her house and totally breached her privacy while she was in a very vulnerable state.

Also, Bella ditches all of her friends to spend more time with Edward, because that’s what you should do when you’re in love, right? Correct me if I’m wrong, but this does not seem to be a good thing to teach young girls.

I’m not even slightly close to being an expert on relationships, but as an objective, third party person, this relationship seems a little unhealthy. Now maybe it’s just me, but I’m pretty sure if a guy I had only known for a short period of time came up to me and said “Grace, you are my life now,” I would be hitting the panic button. I would also probably be thinking, “whoa dude, get your own life.”

That kind of codependency is a little too much pressure for me to handle.

Twilight is useful because it shows us exactly what not to do. Watch the series and you’ll be able to create a helpful list of “do not’s” in a relationship.

I think Bella and Edward really just need a teaching from Chip Judd on boundaries. Judd talks about how you cannot rely on other people to make you happy. He says that others are not responsible for your emotions. In my experience if you embrace those words life is a heck of a lot easier. I’m a much happier person now that I’ve realized that other people aren’t responsible for making me happy. I don’t mean that your relationships don’t contribute to your emotions and state of being — I mean that it is not my parents or friends or coworkers job to make me happy. It’s a very freeing realization!

Anyways, back to Twilight. After all of that, can you believe that I’ll probably still see Eclipse? Perhaps that makes me a hypocrite. However, I like analyzing the pros and cons of movies no matter what, whether I agree with them or not.

All in all, at the end of the day, the thought of me being the single reason for someone else to live seems less than ideal, and without a tinge of romanticism.

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